Clear Blue Sky

Only working four days a week really has its advantages. I actually slept in until 7 this morning and was greeted but bright sunny skies this morning. Not even a cloud in the sky which really is a switch since it's been pretty miserable and rainy for so long. That clear blue sky is deceiving though. I decided to go for a run this morning since my ankle was feeling just fine and dandy but I just about froze my nips off. I walked out the front door in only sweatpants and a t-shirt thinking the sun and exercise would keep me warm but I was sorely mistaken. I ran about a quarter mile and found I wasn't getting any warmer really so I turned around to go get a sweatshirt only to find that the thermometer said -1. No wonder I was so cold. After retrieving my hoodie, grabbing a pair of gloves, and a sip of water I was out the door again and feeling good. Even in the cold the birds were starting to sing and the fresh snow all over the place was gorgeous.

Mace was super good to me this past Christmas and bought me a 8 gig mp3 player for when I go for walks and runs but I still have to hold on to the bloody thing. When I'm wearing gloves I feel like its going to slip out of my hand so I think I need to find one of those carrying cases for it that straps onto my arm. I'd be mad at myself if I dropped it and it ruined. Its pretty awesome though. Its a touch screen dealy that looks like the touch screen ipod (but isn't) and it has all sorts of cool functions on it. When you download a song onto it it actually downloads all the lyrics on to it too so if you feel like singing while you're listening you have the words right in front of you. I keep learning all the new gadgets and I have my complete music library on it with soooooo much room to spare so I'm downloading music like crazy... well as much as I can on a dial up connection. I'm running out of ideas for music though so if you have some cool stuff that you want to send my way feel free. Those of you that read this pretty much know my tastes and know how eclectic I am. I've actually gone through all my old cd's and riped off all that music and put on the mp3 player. So fun. Obviously I don't do anything super cool on my days off... lol.

So what am I going to do for the rest of my day? Good question. I know there is a bunch of work that needs to be done in the yard but with the new snow that fell yesterday the yard is pretty much a snow field again. I'm thinking that I'm going to search online for some yummy treat to make with the Kitchenaid for Polly and the family tonight. I already started a pot of stew for everyone but I can't eat meat on Friday's during Lent. But I thought with how cold it is outside the guys would appreciate it and it gives Polly an opportunity to just kick back tonight and relax with her family. As for me I'm trying to think of some way to zing up a can of tuna... lol. Maybe I'll just stick to a bowl of mac n cheese. Have a great day folks!

Still Sore

I woke up this morning at my usual 4:30 and even in the dark of my room I could see that my ankle was huge and even more discolored than yesterday. Fortunately however it wasn't as sore as I thought it would be (though the rest of my body was) and headed off to work as usual. I decided that rather than run the risk of slipping again on a weak ankle up in the steep terrain I'd spend the day getting some old growth stand exams done in some river/creek bottoms and take it a bit easier. I still probably ended up hiking 10 miles or so today but I wasn't fighting the amount of snow that I would have been up several thousand feet. It was a gorgeous morning and I was working in nice cedar and hemlock stands that really didn't have much snow at all because of how thick they are, but my luck didn't last. By 1 this afternoon though I'd been dumped on by another storm that swung into the area. I'm talking those monster snow flakes that look really cool when they are falling but you can see them build up on the ground after 5 minutes of watching them. I really thought that perhaps spring was going to "sprung" but the weather gods are working against me. By the time I got back to my pickup this evening it was covered by about 18 inches of fresh snow and I had to chain up yet again to get back home. This snow is just so heavy over the roads that were muddy and slick already I wasn't going to risk sliding off anywhere. But at least now I am home, showered, and in a glorious pair of nice warm DRY pjs. There is something to be said for being dry and being able to elevate a sprained ankle in the evenings... lol. Hope everyone had as interesting of a day as I did.

Only Minor Damage

I knew with the changing weather that the mountains would get me one way or another. The snow is starting to melt off and refreeze daily so conditions are not exactly ideal. When I head out in the morning everything is nice and hard and frozen, perfect to walk/snowshoe over. By about 10 though that snow has changed dramatically into a melty slushy mess. While I try to be careful no matter what because its just me out there alone, the inevitable happened and I took a misstep and ended up taking a pretty good spill down a ravine. I didn't land too terrible hard but did take a few knocks against a couple trees. Luckly I came out of it with no broken bones and only a few scrapes, bruises and a spained ankle. I was so mad at myself and am still not exactly sure how I took such a poor step so I bullied myself up and finished out the day. I do have to say though that my ankle is an interesting shade of blue right now and it took a bit of coaxing to get it out of my boot. I figure I'll take a nice hot shower and soak my ankle in a tub of epsome salts and I'll be good for go tomorrow. While I love the snow I have to say I'm ready for this sloppy stuff to be gone so I can move around more easily. Do have to say it still makes for a pretty picture in the morning.

Just some thoughts

I've been thinking alot about my dad lately. I guess thats not all that surprising since I spend a lot of my typical day alone in the middle of nowhere and what else would be occupying my thoughts at this point and time. I haven't exactly dealt with his loss and people keep telling me that its not healthy. They are probably right but I'm not exactly sure how to go about it. And in all honesty maybe just me thinking about him when I'm trapsing about in the woods is part of my own personal healing process and I just don't know it. Unfortunately a lot of my thoughts right now are focused on how he was doing this past year and those are hard things to deal with, but I keep trying to tell myself that there is so much more and much happier things to think about. I want to get back to thinking about so many days spent camping out in the woods with him, washing the car together, him supporting me at every soccer, volleball, basketball, choir, band, and extracurricular event that I was ever involved in, giving each big bear hugs, and just the time I was so blessed to have him as a dad.

As you all know I'm Catholic and my dad was a very devout one at that. This last year has really put my faith to the test and I'm somewhat confused. In one respect I'm angry that God could have taken away a person that I loved so dearly and looked up to so much. I've really tried to put those feelings aside because deep down I know its not right to feel that way. My faith has always taught me that God has a greater purpose and that for reason's beyond my comprehension He called my dad home to Him, but I keep asking that very human question of "why?". Why is it that a man that worked so hard his entire life, loved his family, put his faith into everything he ever did, and in my mind was a kind and giving person called so early? And at that why did he have to fight the battle he did beforehand? I know that these are questions that I wont necessarily find the answer to because its not my own time to understand them but it doesn't stop them from circling my mind. I keep hoping that this Lent will bring me to a better understanding and in the end bring a certain peace to my heart. I really am seeking that out. My dad found some comfort and peace during his fight with cancer through the praying the Rosary, which is something that I too have picked up again in the last year and find to be a time, every morning before heading off into the world, to meditate and contemplate my own feelings right now.

I know this a "deeper" post than I usually do but its whats on my mind these days and I figure maybe if I put it into words I might be able to move past these emotions. I know dad is probably looking down on my and telling me not to sweat the small stuff (thats a dadism) because he's in a better place now. So on that note I want to leave you with one of my favorite pictures of my dad when he was about 20 and working up in the woods outside of Missoula. This is a picture I look at a lot and reminds me how much I am like him. Love you all and God Bless.